Does that question sound familiar? If you’ve ever seen Tyler Perry's The Family That Preys, you’ve absolutely heard it before. When I watched the film for the first time over a year ago, that line really resonated with me. Of course I didn't realize quite how much that question would come to mean until very recently.
Several months ago, I made a major decision. I know a lot of us say we're going to do something to change our lives, but when the time comes to implement, we fall short. For me, falling short was no longer an option. Had I continued on my path, it would have meant my death. Death because I was literally eating myself to death. So, here I am, three and a half months post weight loss surgey and 70 lbs down. It's so amazing. It's not just the changes in numbers but the way that those changes in numbers correlate to changes in my life.
Yesterday, I went to this really expansive farmers market filled with all the horrible things in which I used to partake. Funnel cakes, fresh squeezed lemonade, hamburgers…you name it! Ironically, a year ago, I would have probably walked down one aisle, stopped to get "snacks" several times, and then left because my back was hurting. Not anymore. I walked the entire property yesterday. No pain at all. If that’s not change, I don’t know what is. Interestingly, as crazy as this may sound, there's a bit of sadness associated with this newfound freedom that my RNY has given me. I realized over this past week how I, like the character in the movie, was existing, but wasn't really living. I was going through the motions, keeping a smile on my face, and pretending that even at my highest weight, everything was fine. Now I know it wasn't. Today, because of the choice I made to have the surgery, I'm really present. Really feeling. Really experiencing. Today, I truly live. And if I never lost another pound (don’t get me wrong…I intend to lose many more) I have already been blessed.
Choose to live!
